The man jumped out of bed, hastily pulled on his pants, and ran into the closet. Within moments, he could hear the woman arguing with her jealous husband.

Thinking he was safe, the man was shocked to suddenly hear a voice next to him. "I'm gonna scream!" said the child-like voice.

Uh-oh, he thought. It was Johnny, his lover's little son. "Wait a minute, kid," he whispered to the boy, "I'll give you $10 if you keep quiet."

"I'm gonna scream!" Johnny said again. "Uhhh, look... I'll give you $50 - just don't scream!" replied the man again.

"I'm gonna scream!" the child replied once more. "Look kid... here's $100, it's all I have!"

"Okay.", said Johnny.

So the woman's husband finally left, and the man escaped detection, much to his relief.

Two weeks later, Johnny was out shopping with his mother. They were at Toys R Us, and little Johnny had wandered over to the bike section.

"Mommy! Mommy! I want THAT bike!" he cried.

"Maybe for Christmas, honey. Mommy doesn't have the money right now." she replied.

"I do!" he said, and produced 5 crisp twenty dollar bills.

"Where did you get that money young man?" she asked. But Johnny would not tell. Furious, she decided that she would take Johnny to the local priest and see if he could get Johnny to talk.

So, she took Johnny to the church and met the priest outside the confessional. "Father," she said, "Little Johnny has found $100, and I don't know where he got it. He won't tell me, and I was hoping you could get him to confess it."

"Certainly my dear." The priest entered the confessional, and Johnny did as well.

"I'm gonna scream," said Johnny.

The priest replied, "Let's not start THAT shit again!"

Submitted by Azrael